


shooting the moon

by writerlily



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-17
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-16 10:18:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11826693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writerlily/pseuds/writerlily
Summary: She meets him at a bar where she's far too young to be at. The girls had dragged her out for a night of fun, slabbing on makeup and bright red lipsticks, with outfits and heels that would make their mothers faint. Her group of girls have already dispersed around the bar to talk to men with a kind of sex appeal Maria thinks she lacks.





	shooting the moon

She meets him at a bar where she's far too young to be at. The girls had dragged her out for a night of fun, slabbing on makeup and bright red lipsticks, with outfits and heels that would make their mothers faint. Her group of girls have already dispersed around the bar to talk to men with a kind of sex appeal Maria thinks she lacks. 

She tries to look older. She stands straight, she bats her eyelashes behind the rim of her glass filled with club soda, and even laughs like a proper lady behind her hand when she spots her friend doing something. But it's not her and he must notice because he's sliding up next to her. 

"Can I buy you a real drink?" Are his first words to her. She glances at him and would be lying if she didn't think him handsome. With his dark hair and darker eyes, there's definitely something about him. But he reeks of ego and money and Maria shouldn't be surprised. Men are one in the same it seems, as she looks at the other older men in expensive suits milling around with drinks and cigars in their hands. 

"No," she says and sets her glass down. She's never been one to waste her time and it seems that this night is exactly that. "But thank you anyway."

She sees the flicker of surprise in his eyes. He's not used to being turned down and Maria actually snorts as she turns on her heel to leave. 

She goes back to the dorms that night and kicks off her too high heels and slips off the mask of makeup until she's staring at a plain girl in the mirror of her dimly lit bathroom. 

\--

Her parents expect everything and nothing from her. To be the perfect daughter: to smile prettily, giggle behind her hand, clean the house, cook, and the list goes on of all the conventional things that she's expected to be. They protest against her going away for college, wondering why she doesn't just marry a boy from her small town, and become a mother at her ridiculously young age. 

They don't know that she has other things in mind. 

Things like an education, and to get as far away as possible from her home, to have autonomy and independence, and it's endlessly frustrating for someone like her to want things that are so much bigger than her. 

\--

She's walking with her girls after class one day when one of them puts a hand on her arm.

"Maria, isn't that the guy from the bar?" Her friend Angelica whispers and Maria's head snaps up, her eyes narrowing, as she spots the man leaning against a very expensive looking car. He has sunglasses on and his hands stuffed in his pockets. She scoffs. 

"Ignore him," she hisses and the girls all giggle behind their dainty hands as they walk away, but they don't get far without him quickly walking up beside her.

A smirk plastered to his face and a hello to the ladies. "Maria, was it?"

"I don't recall giving you my name," she points her nose in the air and keeps her eyesight forward. The girls have fallen back to give them their space and she scowls. Traitors, she thinks. "I find it a little creepy that you've managed to find out where I go to school and what my name is without me telling you."

He laughs. It's deep and smooth and not entirely unpleasant to her ears. "It wasn't that hard to find out from your friends at the bar."

She scoffs, the heels of her shoes clacking against the pavement as he keeps up with her. "Still creepy."

"Will it be better if I tell you my name?"

"I don't care to know it," she says and looks at him from the corner of her eye. He has a small grin on his face now. 

"I've always liked challenges," he says and Maria can feel her nostrils flare. 

"I'm not some problem for you to solve," she rounds on him and he stumbles back in surprise. "Now go away and leave me alone."

To her surprise, he stays rooted in his spot as she turns back around and walks to the dorms by herself. Some strange part of her is saying that she's making some mistake. That she needs to let loose a little and take a chance, but she shushes that irritating voice. 

-

She's graduating the top of her class. She's proud of herself, of how dedicated she was to her studies, and now she gets to start a new chapter of her life. She's in a dark graduation gown covering everything except her ankles and newly purchased heels. She's laughing with her core group of girlfriends, drinking cheap champagne in plastic cups, and trying not to get too teary eyed at the prospect of them all going in different directions. 

She excuses herself to go use the restroom before the actual ceremony starts, but stops in her tracks. 

"What are you doing here?" She raises a brow at the same man from those times before. He's dressed a little nicer this time with his hair cropped a little shorter and his facial hair neatly trimmed. She kind of hates herself for even noticing. 

"Pleasure to see you too," he nods and gives her a charming smile at her greeting. 

She rolls her eyes. "I thought I made it clear that I didn't care to see you again."

"Oh good lord," he laughs. And laughs until she's certain there is a tear coming out of his eye. "You're something else."

"You don't even know me."

"I was trying to," he calms from his laughter and puts his hands in his pockets. He pauses. "I'm the guest speaker for your graduation today."

Maria furrows her brows. "Why would you be?"

He tilts his head at her and she doesn't like what it implies. That she's daft and has missed some point. "I'm Howard. Howard Stark."

The name sounds vaguely familiar and it takes her a moment to realize exactly who he is. "Okay," she says. He didn't have a mustache the last times she saw him, and had much longer hair, and she figures that's the reason why she and her friends didn't realize who he was. She can recollect now seeing a few pictures of him here and there in the newspapers, but she never lingered on whatever article was written about him, instead preferring to read from the Arts sections. She presses her lips together, shifts a little nervously on the heels of her shoes, all while he watches her with a glint in his eyes. "I look forward to your speech."

At the end of the ceremony, and at the end of Howard's admittedly amazing speech, they somehow find each other again amongst the sea of graduates and families. It seems like she's doomed to always run into him. She can grab the wolf by its ears and face the situation head on, or keep running away. 

She's a little tired of running.

They walk slowly towards each other until they're standing about a foot apart. 

"Congratulations."

"Thank you," she says politely as they continue to stare at each other. She bites her lip. "I should apologize. For how short I was with you."

"You should only apologize if you mean it," he says with a smirk. "And not just because you know who I am now."

She brushes a strand of her hair back behind her ear to think on it for a moment before shaking her head. "It's not because I know who you are now."

"I would like to take you out sometime. No funny business, I swear," Howard says and crosses his two fingers over his heart. Scout's honor. It actually makes her laugh and his eyes light up at the sound. "What are your plans?"

"For tonight, or the future?"

Howard smiles and it's a dangerous kind of smile. "Both, I guess."

\--

Her father hates Howard. 

No, hate is an understatement. Loathes. Despises. Detests. Etc, etc. 

It makes her like him even more, if she's being completely honest. 

But Howard being Howard takes it all in good stride, kissing her on her temple when her parent's backs are turned. "Parents never like me."

"Met many girl's parents, have you?" Maria raises a brow and leans away from him. 

His eyes are dancing with laughter. Oh, he's-- he's poking fun at her, and she has half a mind to step on his shiny shoes that she knows he loves so much because he dragged her with him to just about every damn department store in the city to find them. "Just yours, sweetheart," he flicks a glance down at her lips. 

"Behave," she tuts at him, putting a hand on his chest to create distance between them, even though she'd like nothing more than to kiss him and taste the whiskey on his tongue. 

Howard rolls his eyes at her, but listens anyway and takes a wide step away from her. "Happy?"

She wants to say something snarky and continue their banter, but his question makes her realize that she is actually _very_ happy. In Howard, she's found someone who understands and respects her goals and wants. In Howard, she's found someone who she can be herself with. She can laugh as loud as she wants until she's snorting and he's tickling her sides. She can curse and be brash and be open and _free_. It's this realization that has her grabbing the lapels of his suit jacket and saying to hell with her parent's disapproval. She kisses him, swiping her tongue across his bottom lip, and laughing quietly when she hears her mother gasp at the sight of them. 

"Just peachy," she tells him with a dimpled smile. 

\--

She likes it best when he drops his smug attitude. Likes it best when he unfurls like a blooming flower and gives her this small smile, and it is a very small thing indeed, that makes everything click into place. 

It's a smile that spreads warmth from her head to her toes, especially since she knows without a doubt that he doesn't look at anyone else like that. Hasn't ever looked at anyone else like that. It makes her feel like she's something more and it's both delightful and frightful. 

"It's always you," he says to her one night, when her lipstick is smeared across his lips, making him look like he's trying on makeup for himself. She can't find it in herself to laugh, however, because the way he's looking at her melts away every doubt in her body. "Always," his voice is a soft whisper. 

Vulnerable, almost. 

And Maria knows exactly how he feels. 

Because she feels it too.

\--

Their marriage comes eventually, but only when she's settled into life after graduating and after she's found a job for herself that isn't limited to clerical work and secretarial services. 

It's a rare thing indeed, for a woman to find a job like the one she happened upon. A part of her thinks she might have only been hired because of her connection to Stark.

Their relationship is no secret, as every gossip rag writes anything they can about the couple. Not that she actually reads anything the press has to say about them anyway. It's her mother, Maria rolls her eyes, who is constantly calling the couple to tell them that there's another article about them and _goodness Maria, stop wearing such short dresses!_

But if her landing the job was due to her partner, then those claims are easily laid to rest when she proves that her abilities lie far beyond her luck at finding the perfect man. 

Their marriage is a quick affair. Howard being Howard wanted to throw a lavish affair, but she wanted something minuscule in comparison to his grand ideas. 

As always. 

They get married at city hall with her parents as witnesses, and she ignores her dad's grumbling when Howard kisses her a little too long after the judge has pronounced them husband and wife. 

It's perfect though, their wedding, and this thing they have between them. 

She thinks back on the night she met Howard at the bar, how she rejected him, and went home thinking lowly of herself. 

If only she could go back in time and tell her younger self that she was enough.

\--

Anthony Edward Stark. 

He's born with a tuft of black hair, kicking and screaming like he's already putting up a fight with the universe for making him leave the womb. He's-- he's perfect, and if Howard cries a bit in the delivery room, well, that's only between them.

It's a humbling thought knowing that she's a mother now. All her life she swore she would never become like the other girls in society. She never wanted marriage, and children, and all of the conventional ideas that are so heavily shoved down every woman's throat from the moment they're born. But it's an altogether different feeling now that she's both a wife and a mother herself. After all, she was the one who chose this. She was able to choose going to school, and choose working at a job to make her own money. She chose Howard, she chose to have her baby boy. 

She's been knocked off her feet in the best way possible.

\--

Tony, is what they nickname him, and he's a spirited little thing. All limbs and chubby baby rolls and dimpled smiles that almost startle Maria because looking at her son is like looking at herself. But he's more Howard than anything, something she dislikes admitting because Howard feels the need to gloat about it endlessly. Tony is still young, but already shows the trademark Stark characteristics. The impulsiveness, and intelligence, and entitlement, and arrogance. He won't even eat certain foods, for God's sake, preferring only fancier things cooked by the chef that Howard hired. The Stark men are one in the same, it seems, yet Maria can't find it in herself to care much really, reminding herself that it was a Stark man she fell in love with.

And things just seem so perfect while they're in their bubble. 

Howard's company is booming, Maria just got promoted at work, and Tony is already far advanced than any child his age. 

It's all just so surreal and Maria should've known that perfection was only an illusion.

\--

Howard's job takes him away from home more often than Maria likes.

Another one of Tony's birthdays passes by with Howard gone, and Maria clenches her jaw when he comes home with a truckload of presents that he feels will make up for his prolonged absence.

She doesn't want to be that wife, and that woman, who nags her husband and gets mad at him, but things are more difficult without Howard around. Tony's father should be there, especially since he's still so young, and who Maria suspects is starting to catch on more and more to his father's absence. 

Maria sees it in the way Tony pushes himself harder to achieve more and do more to make Howard proud. It breaks Maria's heart a little to see her son try so hard and to only be disappointed when an A on a test doesn't stop Howard from stepping out the door.

\--

They fight more often these days.

Things are tense as Howard spends most of his time helping S.H.I.E.L.D. And while it is for a good cause and for the greater good of all mankind, Maria can't help but despise the organization for taking up so much of Howard's time.

\--

Tony gets accepted into MIT. She cries what seems like a river of tears when he graduates high school. He rolls his eyes good naturedly at her and kisses her forehead. 

He's bright with optimism and youth and her son just about breaks her heart every which way. She's just so-- so proud of what he's accomplished. And she wishes that it could be enough, because she knows that is not her validation that he seeks. 

It's Howard's.

Howard, who left in the middle of Tony's ceremony to call work. Howard, who, upon Tony's acceptance letter into MIT, simply told him that he expected nothing less from a Stark son. 

She squeezes Tony's hand when his eyes dart around the field for the familiar head of greying hair. "Work," she says softly, imploring him to look at her. 

He finally does, and she can see the flash of disappointment in his eyes, before it disappears and he shrugs. "Of course it's work," he says. 

Maria tugs on his ear, gives him a soft smile. "I'm so proud of you Tony," she smooths out his graduation gown across his chest and leans up to kiss his cheek. He's taller than her now, even while she's in heels, and he meets her halfway by ducking his head down. 

His smile is lopsided. "I'm expecting a large celebration feast," he says, making her laugh and shake her head. "I'm serious, mom. Graduations are long affairs and I only had pancakes and bacon and toast this morning."

"Only," she scoffs teasingly and motions for her to follow him. 

They expect to see Howard in the parking lot, but their driver informs them that Start Sr. had to leave early for an emergency at work and sends his apologies.

This time it's Tony who squeezes Maria's hand. 

\--

With time comes change, and the years have both been kind and difficult for Maria and Howard.

Howard pulls away more and more from her, until she's certain that her marriage to him has been something reduced to a flimsy piece of paper. 

He is not without his faults and the way he chooses work over family seems to be the biggest flaw in his armor. 

They live two lives while Tony hovers around the both of them. 

Maria often finds herself wondering if she could have prevented her marriage from becoming this way. Maybe she should've offered to join S.H.I.E.L.D., even though there wouldn't have been much for her to contribute. Maybe she should've fought more for him to be home and to spend time with her. 

But she's never wanted to be a cage. A bigger part of her understands Howard's dreams, however grand they must be. Who is she to step in between him and the world? She knew from the beginning that he was ambitious, to the point of crazy it sometimes seemed. 

It almost makes it easier for her to forgive him time and time again. 

\--

Tony is home on break and he sulks around the house. He throws more temper tantrums now than when he was a child. Harsh words are exchanged between her husband and son and Maria finds it difficult to intervene. 

 

So when Howard asks her to accompany him on a work trip, she suggests bringing Tony instead. 

"So we can fight the whole way?" Howard scoffs. "I don't think so."

"You never spend any time with him," she points out, coming to stand beside him as he lights a cigarette. Before he can even inhale, she yanks the cigarette from his lips and puts it out. "You're too old to still be smoking."

Howard rolls his eyes, but tosses the pack of cigarettes aside anyway. He sighs and looks at her. 

"I never spend any time with you either," he says softly, almost regretfully. He looks down at her hand and tugs on one of them until she's pressed against him. "I'm not a good husband, an even worse father. But I'll change."

Something tugs at her to believe him and she places her hands on his shoulders. He looks older, with his grey hair and wrinkles adorning his face. The face of the man that she loves too much despite everything. 

"This thing with Tony," he trails off, sounding even more regretful and even more sad. "I'll work on it when we get back."

"You'll work on it?" She raises a brow. "He's your son, not a project."

"I don't know how to be the father he wants," he confesses. "All I know is work. I wouldn't even know where to begin with fixing things with him." 

The fact that he's even discussing this with her right now shows that he's serious and Maria tilts his chin up with a slender finger. "Just promise me you'll try."

"I promise."

\--

She had never been in a car crash before. 

It happens much faster than she expects. One minute, they're driving down the dark road when suddenly she's pinned between her seat and the dashboard. 

"Howard," she calls out weakly when she comes to. He's not in the driver's seat and she can't exactly turn her head to look where he is. "Howard," she cries out again. The pain in her chest is becoming unbearable and she can't help the tears that roll down her face. 

She vaguely feels something wet and sticky and that can only mean one thing in a situation like this. She clenches her eyes shut. "Howard," she tries calling out louder this time, because maybe he's walked away to look for help. Maybe he's searching for rescue and maybe everything will be okay. She just wishes he hadn't left her alone and a sharp pain makes her wince. 

Suddenly she hears a thump on the side of the car where she can't see. She strains her ears, perking up when she hears what might be a male voice. 

"Howard," she tries again, feeling weaker and weaker. 

"Maria," he finally calls back out to her and she cries in relief, but notices something odd in his voice. "Everything will be all right, sweetheart."

She tries thinking of something to say, but the clarity of her vision keeps swimming in and out and she tries to stay awake. Loud thumps and the slight shake of the car have her opening her eyes. She calls out Howard's name again, and when her ears pick up someone walking to her, she almost sighs in relief. 

But her relief is cut short when a hand wraps around her throat. 

\--

When all is said and done, Maria is thankful for her time with Howard. The good, the bad, the ups, the downs. Every moment was worth it just to be with him, and to be able to have their son together. Howard was a creator at heart, working tirelessly to perfect whatever he created, and Tony was nothing short of perfection.

One of her fondest memories is when Tony was six years old. Howard rented a beach house and they spent the summer there together. 

Everyday was by the beach, with the sun shining, and the sand almost white, and the water so clear you only needed to look directly down to see the bottom. 

Howard took time off of work after Maria made him sleep on the couch for being gone longer than the two months he initially said. 

There was no fighting, or tense words about work. There was only Howard-- the man she married-- and the son they shared and loved. 

She often found herself wishing that she could go back to that summer and keep them there at that beach, far away from the world.

Because it was _perfect_ and to live the life that she was able to with the two men she loved most in the world was _perfect._


End file.
